In Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and wrestling gyms, stepping onto the mat is never just about physical skill. It’s also about respect, hierarchy, and tradition. But why are lower belts generally taught not to ask higher belts to spar? A rule so ingrained it’s sometimes called the death sentence in most gyms…(joking). But why does this tradition exist, and is it still relevant today? That question recently sparked a heated discussion when Ryron Gracie, third-generation Gracie pioneer and head instructor at Gracie Jiu-Jitsu Academy, shared his thoughts on X. Could this long-standing etiquette be misunderstood?
Gracie, a black belt winner, explained that hesitation from blue and purple belts isn’t uncommon. “Sometimes blue belts or purple belts come up to me and say, ‘He don’t want his farm, can we go?’ and they ask with a little bit of hesitation,” he said. “That’s because it’s not uncommon for lower belts to be told it is disrespectful to ask a higher belt to spar. Now, I don’t think it’s disrespectful at all.”
He also noted the subtle fears higher belts sometimes feel: “Maybe they tell themselves a story, or the lower belt might tell themselves a story, like, ‘Oh, I asked him to roll and he said no. Maybe I’m too tough. I’m too much to deal with.’” If even legends admit there’s uncertainty, should these traditions be reexamined?
Ben Askren, the American former MMA fighter and Olympic wrestler, didn’t hesitate to respond. “This is lame… as long as who is asking is being respectful there should be no issue with someone trying to get an elite feel,” he wrote.
This is lame.. as long as who is asking is being respectful there should be no issue with someone trying to get an elite feel https://t.co/qhh75uupCG
— Funky (@Benaskren) August 16, 2025
Askren’s credentials speak volumes: a two-time NCAA Division I wrestling champion, plus a recognized BJJ brown belt (and self appointed black belt). Remarkably, he replied even though a severe case of pneumonia had recently hospitalized him. During that time, he underwent a double lung transplant and spent 59 days in the hospital, and now, he is recovering at home. Returning to the BJJ debate, even black belt competitors have opinions on the long-standing tradition of spar thing.
Why respect matters more than rank on the wrestling mat?
Last year, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt Josh Hinger called out a common misconception in BJJ: that lower belts must roll with higher belts. He stated, “You ARE NOT obligated to train with ANYONE no matter what color their belt is… Apparently some people think there is a rule that white and blue belts can’t say no to higher ranked grapplers. This is absolute nonsensical bullsh*t. If someone asks you to train and you don’t want to, a simple ‘no thanks’ is perfectly acceptable. End of discussion.” He emphasized that newer grapplers should feel empowered to set boundaries without fearing disrespect or breaking wrestling tradition.
Hinger also stressed the importance of personal safety and comfort during training. “You don’t owe anyone sh*t. You don’t owe them training rounds, and you don’t owe them an explanation… Whatever the reason, it doesn’t matter. Just say no thanks and that’s the end of it,” he explained. By speaking openly, he reminded students that consent and well-being are more important than rigid adherence to hierarchy.
He further warned that if a higher belt pressures a lower belt after a refusal, it’s a serious red flag. “Clearly there is something wrong with this person,” Hinger said. “In such a case, you should definitely be wary of training with them again.” By challenging this so-called rule, he emphasized that Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and wrestling should focus on learning, respect, and safe training rather than fear or outdated customs.
The post Ben Askren Gets Back to Form as Wrestling Legend Hits Back to Controversy appeared first on EssentiallySports.